Sunday, April 13, 2008
Lots of nothingness
Completely blah. She stayed in her room and watched t.v. all day. Of course there was the standard "Can I go to the bathroom?" and can I watch t.v.?", but those are routine anymore. Today was so blah I didn't even care that she kept asking me those things over and over again. I kind of felt like someone who is being held captive, not tied up, but knowing there is nowhere else to go. Just sitting and playing mindless games on the computer, answering her mindless questions with mindless yeses. Since the camp people (her teachers) thought she could take a shower by herself, I decided to give it a try, mostly because I could barely bring myself to do it. I watched as she lathered up her hair, not like I would do it, but she did okay. She did a good job of rinsing, much to my surprise. I actually started to hope that maybe she can do this by herself. I stepped back and watched as she tried to lather up a dry wash cloth. Reminded her that it has to be wet, stood there for the three minutes it took for her to process what I said, then watched as she washed her arms, then her bottom, then rinsed and said "Oops, I forgot my face". I informed her she just wouldn't be washing it, since she didn't wash in the right order. So much for my hopes. Fortunately for me, I was pretty sure she couldn't do it anyway, but a gal can hope, right? It is completely beyond my understanding how someone can take a shower every day for 13 years and still not know how to do it.
Subscribe to:
Post Comments (Atom)
2 comments:
im reading your blog and it just depresses me. You are a very unhappy woman who looks at herself as a victim.
Thank you for commenting. You are correct that I am very unhappy. I suppose you are also correct that I see my self as a victim. When Chelsea's sister was murdered, I became a victim of her murder along with the rest of my family. I was once very happy, but the life I had built was taken away from me by that senseless act of violence. I long every day to have it back, but it will never be, as the consequences are many, including having left Chelsea with a father who can't cope with her and a mother in prison. Venting my emotions here are my way of dealing with it. I am sorry it depresses you, but it is the reality of my life with Chelsea. I hope you can understand that.
Post a Comment